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Chocolate covered peanut butter malt balls…my kryptonite.

An “excuse” is a lie that you use to “excuse yourself” from the inevitable discomfort that goes with reaching your dreams. If you catch yourself making them, don’t beat yourself up. We all do it!

Take me for an example, I’ve been doing some more healing work that has me digging up more old trauma and I’m using excuses a bunch to amp up my sugar intake as a way to cope with these big feelings.

Hey, you gotta do what you gotta do. But now I’m having trouble getting through a day without a trip to the bins for chocolate covered malt balls. It’s my kryptonite.

So I’m setting my intension to feel my feelings and sit with the discomfort of whatever wants to come up for me.

10 of the most fattening excuses:

1)  I deserve it.

This is my current excuse. I’m telling myself that I deserve some sugar because healing is hard. It’s a popular excuse lie that typically comes right before I gobble handfuls of chocolate covered malt balls. Maybe you can relate? If so, ask yourself this: Is it true that you deserve to stuff yourself silly with empty calories after a long, difficult day? How much comfort does this truly provide? Maybe you should spend some time thinking about what you really deserve? A hot bath? I hug? A good laugh? Some recognition for all you do?

2)  I’m just lazy

I hear this one a lot. Here are my thoughts: You are not “just lazy.” You are thinking a thought about yourself that leads you to feel discouraged and, more than likely, lie dormant for days gobbling malt balls. For the mere practicality of it, try thinking something more empowering about yourself like “I enjoy having fun.” See what changes. I bet when you believe this one instead you have a lot easier time thinking about fun ways to move around. Try some new thoughts on for size.

3) It’s too hard

This is a good excuse lie for those of us who would rather hide than risk “failure.” Your dreams are not going to fall in your lap. You have to be willing to get a little uncomfortable to establish new habits. If it were easy… well you know.

4)  I don’t care.

This is another binge inducing excuse lie. Is it true that you don’t care? Or is it a handy dandy fib to justify eating that pint of Ben and Jerry’s? What is the truth? What do you care about? Get your notebook out and learn something about yourself!

5)  I’m too overwhelmed

This is a popular one among us moms. There are lots of variations. “I’m too overwhelmed from all the healing I’m doing (ahem),” “I’m too tired,” “I don’t have enough time.” It’s a great excuse lie to use when you’d like to “excuse yourself” from taking action on behalf of your own self-care. But, ask yourself this: What kind of example are you setting for your kiddos?

6) I’m fat

We just love to look in the mirror and find ways we don’t measure up. Too much cellulite. Too much flab. Too many pounds. Stop fat shaming yourself! Remember this, “fat” is neutral. It’s just a bunch of cells. Neither good nor bad. It’s how you think about the extra weight that leads you to feel terrible which leads you into that thing you do to numb your emotional pain which leads you to gain more of those neutral fat cells. Stick to the facts, I am a size xx. I currently weigh xx. Then repeat after me: “I am who I am and that is enough.” Stop making the extra weight mean anything more than that. You’ll eat less when you do.

7) I screwed up

Maybe you did just consume another bag full of bin candy. It may have been some combination of overwhelm, sadness, anger, fear or confusion that led you to eat the whole bag but it’s the thought “I screwed up,” and all the self-critical commentary that come afterwards that lead you to want to eat more to cover up the shame for having just “screwed up.” See the cycle? Try taking some time to think about why you felt the need to eat the whole bag, you might just learn something important about yourself and prevent the episode from happening again.

8) I’m too old

Repeat after me: age is never a factor, unless you make it one. Think about your current age. If you live until 90, how many years do you have left? How do you want to spend those years? Stop making excuses to play small and start thinking about all the amazing things you could be doing with your life in the years to come!

9)  I’m either on or off my routine

This is classic black or white thinking. Polarized thinking… the world is really stuck in this right now. But think about yin/yang. There is  truth to be found in everything, shades of grey abound, yet our brains loves to think in terms of black or white.  “Falling off the wagon,” is just a handy lie when you’d like to “excuse yourself” from your dreams. The truth is you’re never “on” or “off” anything. So notice yourself falling out of good habits, figure out why and fix it. It’s not what you do to cause the relapse that matters; it’s what you do afterwards that really makes a difference.

10) I should…

Complete this sentence – “I should have gone to the gym today.” “I should not have lost my cool with my kids today.” “I should be cooking a healthy meal every night.” The term “should” always leads to feeling crappy because it’s always a sign that you are fighting a battle with reality. What is, is. When you fight THAT you lose every time. Try the word “could” instead. Starting to see some possibilities? Me too.

So when you hear yourself making excuses, recognize them for what they are – Lies. As with any lie, there’s always truth hidden beneath. So the solution is simple, ask the part of yourself that is making excuses, “What’s really true?” And move forward from that place of clarity.  Your body will thank you for it.

If you enjoyed this post about mind clutter, I’ll be offering a free class on this topic exclusively for life coaches and other service based entrepreneurs. Click here to be the first to know about this free workshop and my upcoming mentorship program for coaches.